Wednesday, November 19, 2014

I tried to warn myself...

I woke this morning, at 6am, to the moo-ing of someones escaped cow in the yard, dogs barking, howling, making a fuss... I thought, oh boy, this is going to be a day. I tried to sleep but tossed and turned thinking-surely they will be quiet soon.

A few simple, but important, things were on the docket as "supposed to happen today" skype dates with a long lost love, and exciting weekend plans sorted out... When I awoke to this moo, I actually thought, don't get too excited, don't have any expectations for todays outcome.

But I'm a girl of hope, a cup half full, find the best in people, live life kind of girl and as all the plans I was excited about today diminished one by one, my spirit went with it. "I'm always giving, I'm always offering, I'm always... setting myself up for disappointment?

Living a life of hope isn't as easy as it would seem, it takes work and that work occasionally involves two or more people. Does hope have a definition when more than just yourself is involved? Is hope something that can only happen when you can only hope with yourself as to not be disappointed in anyone but your own expectations and avoidance of being let down?

I don't know, but in my quest for this answer I have learned that for me, I will continue to have hope in myself and in other people. Being disappointed brings a third chakra push, and that push makes me feel alive. It asks me to continue having hope that people will eventually start to understand, and if they don't, that is on them, and that is not my shit.

I will continue to have hope, and I'm sure I will continue to be occasionally disappointed. The duality of life shows me that its okay, for without disappointment would there be an observed gain of happiness?


"May the wind always be on your back and the sun always upon your face
and may the winds of destiny carry you aloft to dance with the stars..."